State of the Union: A Dress 

AOC’s dress was on its way to meet Ronald Reagan’s cowboy hat for lunch at the commissary (of the costume department of the Smithsonian Institute) when Melania’s jacket appeared in the hallway.

“Just where do you think You’re going?” it asked, in a heavy Slovenian accent.

“I’m going to Tax the Rich,”replied AOC’s dress. “I thought you didn’t care.”

Just then a gang of bikers roared in and snatched up AOC’s dress.

“We’re gonna dunk you in Boston harbor,” they sneered, as they headed north on the 95.

“If we can’t have Liberty we can at least brew us some Libtard tea!!”

Only able to wave goodbye, Bernie’s Mittens did just that.

“I always thought that that dress would’ve looked better in Democrat blue,” Bill Clinton whispered to himself, from behind a curtain, as it quieted down, “with slimy white letters.”

Elliot Sperber is a writer, attorney, and adjunct professor. He lives in New York City and can be reached at and on twitter @elliot_sperber