COVID-19’s Coming to Town

You better not cough,
You better not sigh.
You better not sneeze,
I’m telling you why:
COVID-19’s coming to town.

It’s spreading so fast,
And taking folks down.
The nastiest darn
Pandemic around:
COVID-19’s coming to town.

It knows when you’ve been careful,
It knows when rules you break.
It knows when you’ve been sharing space,
So stay masked for goodness sake!

Please keep your guard up,
And scrub your house down.
Don’t listen to a word
From the orange-faced clown:
COVID-19’s coming to town.

This song is available to anyone undignified enough to wish to sing it.


Hugh Iglarsh is a Chicago-based writer, editor, critic and satirist. He can be reached at