FacebookTwitterGoogle+RedditEmail

Classified Transcript of Susan Rice-Xi Jinping Meeting in Beijing Uncovered

National Security Adviser Susan Rice recently wound up her stay in China to prepare the November visit of President Obama, President of The Indispensible Nation. She was greeted with due pomp by Xi Jinping, President of China, one of the Dispensible Nations.

I wrote about that visit earlier. A transcript of the interchange was not available at the time, but it has now been provided by anonymous sources, every bit as reliable as those of the NYT’s Chief Military Correspondent, the indispensible Michael R. Gordon. (For those not aware of Gordon’s reportorial prowess, he co-authored, with Judith Miller, the key article on Iraq’s WMD in 2002, which was praised greatly by Vice-President Richard Cheney on the very day it appeared and assigned page one status by the indispensible editors of the Times.)

This reporter noticed similarities in style and nuanced diplomatic language between Rice and Victoria Nuland, the Indispensible Assistant Secretary of State for European and Eurasian Affairs, which makes the authenticity of the transcript even more credible. The transcript is as follows:

Xi: It is a delight to have you here in Beijing, and all China looks forward to President Obama’s forthcoming visit. We hope to discuss the emerging possibility of win-win agreements with your country, which will be a great benefit to East Asia and the entire world.

Rice: Let us not waste your time or mine. Why don’t you get behind our sanctions on Russia and Iran – and Cuba and Venezuela while we are at it. We need to get them to change their behavior and eventually their governments. Defying the Indispensible Nation has consequences in the long term. You should make them keenly aware of that.

Xi: (Surprised). Ms. Rice, as you know, our policy is not to interfere in the internal matters of other nations. That has been our policy for centuries and it remains our policy now. And many of your European partners do not appear to be very enthusiastic about such a course either, especially in the Ukraine, if I may say so.

Rice: (Annoyed). To quote my Indispensible colleague, Victoria Nuland, protégé of our next President, the Indispensible Hillary Clinton, “F**k the EU“ – and Russia too while we are at it.

Xi: (Blushing). Russia is a close partner of ours as we seek to develop our countries and those of Central Asia. We plan a vast trading partnership, a new Silk Road. The United States can also benefit from this.

Rice: (Now Angry). Silk Road? You and I know that is just an attempt to build a Eurasian trade path that bypasses the Oceans, which are under control of the Indispensible Navy. I assure you it will not be a happy venture once Russia collapses.

Xi: (Startled). Russia collapse? Its economy has made great gains since the departure of Yeltsin, and its forms of democracy, largely European, seem to be suited to its culture which has made the country more stable.

Rice: (Furious now). Putin is another Hitler – as everyone who reads in rows not columns knows. We have decided that he and the portion of the Russian elite that does not kowtow to the Indispensible Nation must go. Period, Xi, baby.

Xi: (Remaining composed). We hope that you can look for a win-win situation with our friend Vladimir Putin. We were disturbed to see the emergence of neo-fascist forces in Ukraine, and Russia handled that violent situation in a largely peaceful way. Let us hope Ukraine can now have beneficial relations with both the EU and Russia.

Rice: (Even more infuriated). We’ll see about that. You better be a bit more concerned about Japan, where our friend Mr. Abe is on his way to creating an Asian order that will put China in its proper place.

Xi (Shocked). We are indeed concerned about the rise of militarism in Japan. The forces behind it are the very ones that brought the sufferings of World War II on China and the rest of East Asia. And they are all too similar to the ones that have emerged in Kiev. The world does not need that again. And there is no guarantee that such a development would not turn on the United States in the long run. That would serve no one well.

Rice: We shall see about that. You know I have not even mentioned human rights. You are lucky to get off the hook on that one.

Xi: Every country has its human rights problems. We hope to make more progress but already personal liberties are at an all time high her and improving. Well, I know that you have other preparations to make for the upcoming visit of your president. Please contact me if I can help. (Xi departs.)

Rice (Alone except for an aide.) F**king pr**k.

Xi (Now in another room – to Peng Liyuan). I with I could have Dispensed with that conversation.

John V. Walsh writes for Antiwar.com, CounterPunch.com, DissidentVoice.org, and the Unz Review. For those who may be unsure, yes, this piece is satire. The author can be reached at john.endwar@gmail.com 

 

 

 

 

More articles by:

John V. Walsh can be reached at John.Endwar@gmail.com

July 19, 2018
Rajai R. Masri
The West’s Potential Symbiotic Contributions to Freeing a Closed Muslim Mind
Jennifer Matsui
The Blue Pill Presidency
Ryan LaMothe
The Moral and Spiritual Bankruptcy of White Evangelicals
Paul Tritschler
Negative Capability: a Force for Change?
Patrick Bond
State of the BRICS Class Struggle: ‘Social Dialogue’ Reform Frustrations
Rev. William Alberts
A Well-Kept United Methodist Church Secret
Raouf Halaby
Joseph Harsch, Robert Fisk, Franklin Lamb: Three of the Very Best
George Ochenski
He Speaks From Experience: Max Baucus on “Squandered Leadership”
Ted Rall
Right Now, It Looks Like Trump Will Win in 2020
David Swanson
The Intelligence Community Is Neither
Andrew Moss
Chaos or Community in Immigration Policy
Kim Scipes
Where Do We Go From Here? How Do We Get There?
July 18, 2018
Bruce E. Levine
Politics and Psychiatry: the Cost of the Trauma Cover-Up
Frank Stricker
The Crummy Good Economy and the New Serfdom
Linda Ford
Red Fawn Fallis and the Felony of Being Attacked by Cops
David Mattson
Entrusting Grizzlies to a Basket of Deplorables?
Stephen F. Eisenman
Want Gun Control? Arm the Left (It Worked Before)
CJ Hopkins
Trump’s Treasonous Traitor Summit or: How Liberals Learned to Stop Worrying and Love the New McCarthyism
Patrick Bond
State of the BRICS Class Struggle: Repression, Austerity and Worker Militancy
Dan Corjescu
The USA and Russia: Two Sides of the Same Criminal Corporate Coin
The Hudson Report
How Argentina Got the Biggest Loan in the History of the IMF
Kenn Orphan
You Call This Treason?
Max Parry
Ukraine’s Anti-Roma Pogroms Ignored as Russia is Blamed for Global Far Right Resurgence
Ed Meek
Acts of Resistance
July 17, 2018
Conn Hallinan
Trump & The Big Bad Bugs
Robert Hunziker
Trump Kills Science, Nature Strikes Back
John Grant
The Politics of Cruelty
Kenneth Surin
Calculated Buffoonery: Trump in the UK
Binoy Kampmark
Helsinki Theatrics: Trump Meets Putin
Patrick Bond
BRICS From Above, Seen Critically From Below
Jim Kavanagh
Fighting Fake Stories: The New Yorker, Israel and Obama
Daniel Falcone
Chomsky on the Trump NATO Ruse
W. T. Whitney
Oil Underground in Neuquén, Argentina – and a New US Military Base There
Doug Rawlings
Ken Burns’ “The Vietnam War” was Nominated for an Emmy, Does It Deserve It?
Rajan Menon
The United States of Inequality
Thomas Knapp
Have Mueller and Rosenstein Finally Gone Too Far?
Cesar Chelala
An Insatiable Salesman
Dean Baker
Truth, Trump and the Washington Post
Mel Gurtov
Human Rights Trumped
Binoy Kampmark
Putin’s Football Gambit: How the World Cup Paid Off
July 16, 2018
Sheldon Richman
Trump Turns to Gaza as Middle East Deal of the Century Collapses
Charles Pierson
Kirstjen Nielsen Just Wants to Protect You
Brett Wilkins
The Lydda Death March and the Israeli State of Denial
Patrick Cockburn
Trump Knows That the US Can Exercise More Power in a UK Weakened by Brexit
Robert Fisk
The Fisherman of Sarajevo Told Tales Past Wars and Wars to Come
FacebookTwitterGoogle+RedditEmail