Holy Beaver

Holy Beaver

When there’s rain on a plague day
Or plague on a rain day
You really should bring an umbrella, fella
As everything’s closed
And that which may be open you may
Rather not enter — even
With a mask strapped round your face
So don’t go out to Astor Place
Where J.J. Astor skins his castor
That’s beaver to you
Beaver trade’s how he got made
Though most don’t know
That beavers grow for their whole lives
They never reach a terminal size
I don’t know why. Who’s to say?
The DNA?
The Dinah?
In the kitchen — with Longinus? Yes!
Loafing around with his holy cup.
And if that beaver there should sup
From that she’d grow forever
Or nibble some ambrosia
Just a crumb that fell from Zeus’s beard
How long before
She’d grow whale-sized?
How big would she be by
The time she‘d outgrow the planet itself
And dam the streams of cosmic gas
Build galaxies in all of that
Galactic milk (tautology)

And Goldfish, too, I’ve heard
Will grow so
Maybe magic blood of Christ
Splashed on a carp in a basket that night
On Golgotha
And now it’s immortal
But captured by Peter
Is kept in a tub
And’s sliced apart each week
To sell in the market
On Fulton Street
With Alfred Smith
Still terrorized by Oedipus
Killer of kings
And landlords
And reckless drivers
As the holy beaver grows
The cosmos
Captain Kierkegaard
Among the splattered stars opines:
Listen to the voice of God
Like Abraham, when there’s a command
To slaughter someone
You listen —
Eddie Pus, as he’s now known, nods
Watching the flames
And the plagues spread
And the droplets of rain
Bursting on his head like falling bodies
The masks in the street
In the gutters and grass
And other places
Like so many discarded faces
Like leaves on the trees
Of the aftermath

More articles by:

Elliot Sperber is a writer, attorney, and adjunct professor. He lives in New York City and can be reached at elliot.sperber@gmail.com and on twitter @elliot_sperber

Weekend Edition
July 03, 2020
Friday - Sunday
Peter Linebaugh
Police and the Wealth of Nations: Déjà Vu or Unfinished Business?
Rob Urie
Class, Race and Power
John Davis
A Requiem for George Floyd
Jeffrey St. Clair
Roaming Charges: Mutiny of the Bounties!
Richard D. Wolff
Revolutionary Possibilities: Could U.S. Capitalism Turn Nationalist?
Richard Falk
When Rogue States Sanction the International Criminal Court
Louis Proyect
Smearing Black Lives Matter…From the Left
Ralph Nader
Trump and Pence – Step Aside for Professional Pandemic Scientists and Managers
Ramzy Baroud
Tearing Down the Idols of Colonialism: Why Tunisia, Africa Must Demand French Apology
Philippe Marlière
Challenging the French Republic’s Color-Blindness
Richard C. Gross
Attack, Deny
Lee Camp
Connecting the Dates – US Media Used To Stop The ‘Threat’ of Peace
Steve Martinot
The Desire to Kill
David Yearsley
The War on Kitsch
Amy Eva Alberts Warren – Rev. William Alberts
Why are Certain Christians Democratic and Others Authoritarian?
Lawrence Davidson
Covid Madness
Brian Cloughley
Britain’s Disorder and Decline
Ellen Taylor
The US Military Has Its Knee on the Throat of the World
David Rosen
White Nationalists on the Attack
Jeff Cohen
Politicians of Color Should Not be Immune From Criticism
Joseph Natoli
Drawn Away from Reality in Plain View
Frank Joyce
Give Me Liberty,  Give You Death
Jonah Raskin
My Adventures in the Matriarchy
Paul Street
The Racist Counter-Revolution of 1776
Kollibri terre Sonnenblume
The Corruption of the Democratic Party: Talking to Ted Rall about his new book
Medea Benjamin - Nicolas J. S. Davies
Trump’s Record on Foreign Policy: Lost Wars, New Conflicts and Broken Promises
Paul Edwards
A Bridge Too Far
Jennifer Joan Thompson
How to Do Things With Theses: Chile’s National Police Force Sues the Feminist Artistic Collective, Las Tesis
Shawn Fremstad
Vacations for All!
Thomas Knapp
A Modest Proposal for Compromise on “Confederate” Military Bases
Vijay Prashad, Eduardo Viloria Daboín, Ana Maldonado, and Zoe PC
Venezuela’s Borderlands Have Been Assaulted by COVID-19
Thom Hartmann
COVID Masks: The Latest Faux Conservative Outrage
Jesse Jackson
Mandatory College Football Practices in Time of Pandemic are Nuts
Nicholas Vincenzo Barney
Consensus Politics on the Fringe: The Intellectual Dishonesty of the Intellectual Dark Web
Ted Rall
The Data is Clear: Progressives Should Boycott Biden
Theresa Church
In Reconsidering ‘Normalcy’ Genetically Engineered Trees Do Not Belong
Chelsea Carrick
Let’s Not Lose Momentum
Adam Rissien
Sorry Secretary Perdue, Our National Forests are Not Crops
Arshad Khan
India and China Tussle on the Roof of the World
Paul Gilk
A Few Theoretical Percentages
Thomas S. Harrington
“New Corona Cases”:  A Phrase That’s Tells us Very Little, if Anything,  About the Actual Levels of Danger We  Face
Claire Chadwick
I Got COVID-19 at Work. I Won’t be the Last
George Wuerthner
The Upper Green River Should be a National Park, Not a Feedlot
Julian Vigo
Profiteering in the Era of COVID-19
Ravi Mangla
Policing is Not a Public Good