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Momentum Not Mojo

A Translation into Every Day English of President Trump’s Speech to the Boy Scouts of America.

“Thank you all for coming,” President Donald Trump said, as he welcomed thousands to the National Boy Scouts of America Jamboree on Monday.  “What a big crowd. Maybe not bigger than the crowd at my inauguration.  But big.  Very, very big.

“Of course,” he continued, the failing New York Times won’t say one word about just how big it was or how many millions of boys from as far away as Charlottesville came all the way to West Virginia at great personal expense just to hear my words of wisdom.

“Nor will the Times mention that, even as important as the topics may be, in keeping with the apolitical nature of the Boy Scouts, nothing was said about the sewer in Washington that is filled with Democrats and two sour faced flat chested Republican woman.  Nevertheless, I don’t want to talk about Chuck Schumer, Hiliary Clinton, Susan Collins, Lisa Murkowski, fake news or Jeff Sessions.

“No boy scout there.  Big mistake.  Big.  Really big.  Traitor.  Just ask Vladimir.

“But again, I don’t want to talk about traitors, Russian witch hunts or politics. Rather, I want to talk about William Levitt, a very smart real estate developer.  Very smart.   Not as smart as me, of course.  But smart.   So, smart, in fact, that he ended up owning a big yacht.  Not as big as Trump Tower or Trump Yacht.   But bigger than little Marco Rubio’s.

“Why not as big as mine?   Because he didn’t listen to me.  Trust me, I told him ‘don’t lose your momentum.’  But he lost his momentum.

“So, my message to you today is:  just remember, whether you are moving forward or backward what you want is momentum.”