FacebookTwitterGoogle+RedditEmail

Thank You, Donald Trump

The New York Times published a column back in April in which they openly wondered if there were “positive things” we were missing about Donald Trump and even solicited readers to send such positive thoughts to them at: somethingnice@nytimes.comAn actual excerpt from this exhortation : “we’re looking for a few positive words about the president, and we’re asking for your help… It’s not another forum for debating the issues. It is a place to point out positive things Mr. Trump has said or done from the viewpoint of The New York Times and its readers. [emphasis theirs]”

So, in full view of The New York Times (bastion of a free press, the “liberal media” and oh, don’t make me puke), here is my nowhere near exhaustive “Thank You” letter to Donald Trump for all the good he has done thus far. I have also sent a copy to somethingnice@nytimes.com, perhaps if you can think of some nice, sweet things about Donald Trump, you can send them to the NY Times as well.

Thank you Donald Trump for showing that even the most bigoted, racist, misogynistic homophobe can now legitimately have presidential aspirations – you have given hope to so many.

Thank you Donald for bringing Kellyanne Conway and Alternative Facts into our lives. Alternate Facts, Alternate Universe, Alternate Reality – perhaps she is giving us clues and you are just “Bizarro” President. (some will get it)

The cast and crew of Saturday Night Live thank you for the best ratings the show has had in over 20 years.

Thanks for making watching Senate hearings so popular – besides all the ghastly confirmation hearings, did you know movie theaters and other venues aired the Comey hearing live? Who’d a thought? You did that, way to go!

A special thanks for the Betsy Devos hearing where it was proven that no matter how inept and completely lacking in experience someone may be, anyone can get a Presidential Cabinet position as long as they bribe, I mean “give campaign donations to” enough people on the committee evaluating them (well, like, every Republican). And it’s all legal too. Isn’t that great? So, thanks for that, Donald.

In fact, thanks for the whole Cabinet and your team of advisers, particularly Mick Mulvaney, Scott Pruitt, Steve Mnuchin, Tim Price, Betsy Devos, Jeff Sessions,Steve Bannon and Stephen Miller. You have given so many sociopaths government jobs, you must be running some kind of halfway house treatment program. Or maybe just a halfway government?

Thank you for showing us just how broken our political system is: the “checks and balances” of the three branches of government are meaningless when those in the Legislative Branch (that would be Congress) in position to be checking and balancing completely abdicate the responsibility to do so.

Thanks for giving us Sean Spicer hiding in the bushes.

Thanks for giving us the first Triumvirate of the United states: the three hosts at “Fox and Friends” that you take your cues from. Puppet.

Thanks for putting your abusive co-dependent relationship with the corporate media on full display. No matter how much you black them out and how badly you mistreat and abuse the corporate media, they will always come back. You need them. They need you. You only care about yourself and self aggrandizement. They only care about ratings – democracy, freedom of the press and holding power to account be damned. Sad.

Thanks for bringing the art of knitting to a new generation as they knit pussy hats in your honor. Pussy Grabber.

And thanks for the pussy grabbing by the way – which is now incorporated into official White House visits with the Girl Scouts.

Thank you on behalf of bleach manufacturers. Now that Klan rallies are en vogue and white supremacist rats are comfortable enough to crawl out of the wood work – they gotta keep those whites white. And pressed. Usin’ a lot o’ bleach.

Thanks for proving to be an equal opportunity employer and giving both of your wives positions in the White House. Melania and Ivanka.

Thanks for all the deregulation! With getting rid of OSHA rules, EPA Clean Air and Clean Water regulations, gutting labor laws and corporate oversight in general, and putting everyone back to work in the coal mines, it’ll be just like living in the Victorian Era – and I’ve always wanted to do that.

Thanks for all the hypocrisy. Where to begin and end with this? How about: I’m sure all the Republicans would be as tight lipped with Hillary as they are with you when it comes to nepotism – another lovely word climbing back up the lexicon ladder these days. What would they say if her completely unqualified daughter sat at the adult’s table at the G20, or if her equally unqualified son-in-law were given every major task of governing to handle while she went golfing? Mum’s the word.

Thanks for your Climate Change ignorance and pushing for more oil and coal usage. With all that extra global warming here in Appalachia, participants in the Mountains to Sea Trail race will be relieved that the race will get shorter every year.

Also thanks to your help with promoting more fossil fuel use and hence accelerated global warming, can’t wait for my real estate investment in Raleigh to become beach front property!!! Ignorant jackass.

Congratulations! Because of you, so many third graders now know the word “emoluments”. It’s a fancy word for “bribe” – can you say “emoluments”, Donald? No? Well, just say “bribe”, I’m sure you know what that is.

And thanks for all the winning. We’re gonna win all the way to the end…of it all.

Sean Marquis is an activist and journalist. He can be reached at: sean.marquis1@gmail.com.

More articles by:
June 25, 2018
Daniel Falcone
A Reporter’s Reporter: a Conversation With Seymour Hersh
Gerald Sussman
America’s Cold War “Tugboat”
Jonathan Cook
The Defiance that Launched Gaza’s Flaming Kites Cannot be Extinguished
P. Sainath
A Long March of the Dispossessed to Delhi 
Sheldon Richman
What Does Trump Have Against Children?
Lance Olsen
Caught in a Trap of Our Own Making: Climate Change, Blame, and Denial
Seth Sandronsky
A Safe Black Space
Kary Love
Crying Children and Due Process of Law
Gary Leupp
Why It Just Makes Sense for the U.S. to Withdraw from the UNHRC
John Laforge
Kings Bay Plowshares Action Names the Trident with Blood
Mel Gurtov
After Singapore, Is Iran the Next US Target?
Kent D. Shifferd
A Different Perspective on Peace
Uri Avnery
Two Souls
Laura Flanders
National Suicide Point?
Ludwig Watzal
The Death of Felicia Langer
Weekend Edition
June 22, 2018
Friday - Sunday
Karl Grossman
Star Wars Redux: Trump’s Space Force
Andrew Levine
Strange Bedfellows
Jeffrey St. Clair
Intolerable Opinions in an Intolerant Time
Paul Street
None of Us are Free, One of Us is Chained
Edward Curtin
Slow Suicide and the Abandonment of the World
Celina Stien-della Croce
The ‘Soft Coup’ and the Attack on the Brazilian People 
James Bovard
Pro-War Media Deserve Slamming, Not Sainthood
Louisa Willcox
My Friend Margot Kidder: Sharing a Love of Dogs, the Wild, and Speaking Truth to Power
David Rosen
Trump’s War on Sex
Mir Alikhan
Trump, North Korea, and the Death of IR Theory
Christopher Jones
Neoliberalism, Pipelines, and Canadian Political Economy
Barbara Nimri Aziz
Why is Tariq Ramadan Imprisoned?
Robert Fantina
MAGA, Trump Style
Linn Washington Jr.
Justice System Abuses Mothers with No Apologies
Martha Rosenberg
Questions About a Popular Antibiotic Class
Ida Audeh
A Watershed Moment in Palestinian History: Interview with Jamal Juma’
Edward Hunt
The Afghan War is Killing More People Than Ever
Geoff Dutton
Electrocuting Oral Tradition
Don Fitz
When Cuban Polyclinics Were Born
Ramzy Baroud
End the Wars to Halt the Refugee Crisis
Ralph Nader
The Unsurpassed Power trip by an Insuperable Control Freak
Lara Merling
The Pain of Puerto Ricans is a Profit Source for Creditors
James Jordan
Struggle and Defiance at Colombia’s Feast of Pestilence
Tamara Pearson
Indifference to a Hellish World
Kathy Kelly
Hungering for Nuclear Disarmament
Jessicah Pierre
Celebrating the End of Slavery, With One Big Asterisk
Rohullah Naderi
The Ever-Shrinking Space for Hazara Ethnic Group
Binoy Kampmark
Leaving the UN Human Rights Council
Nomi Prins 
How Trump’s Trade Wars Could Lead to a Great Depression
Robert Fisk
Can Former Lebanese MP Mustafa Alloush Turn Even the Coldest of Middle Eastern Sceptics into an Optimist?
FacebookTwitterGoogle+RedditEmail