• Monthly
  • $25
  • $50
  • $100
  • $other
  • use PayPal

ONE WEEK TO DOUBLE YOUR DONATION!

A generous CounterPuncher has offered a $25,000 matching grant. So for this week only, whatever you can donate will be doubled up to $25,000! If you have the means, please donate! If you already have done so, thank you for your support. All contributions are tax-deductible.
FacebookTwitterRedditEmail

By Invitation Only

I got a serious case of the sillies, followed by a burst of creativity, when I watched the final Clinton-Trump debate, the only one I saw. Somewhere during Trump’s inarticulacies and Clinton’s indignation, I discovered a plot and dialogue. Turning to my guy, I said, “A screenplay’s unfolding in my mind.”

He looked at me, waiting. I said, “There’s a meeting of political VIPs, heads of multinational corporations, the top percent of the top percent, the Deciders. They’re schmoozing, toasting their triumphs.”
I didn’t have the opening scene then, so I presented only a sketch. After all, I’d need my computer to search articles, tap into Wikipedia, for info—which I’ve just done. Plus, at the time, I wasn’t privy to certain tapes that would surface. You know what I’m referencing.

So, the first scene, one that depicts gluttonous excess: Bill Clinton reclines on a chaise. Two 20-something women approach. One carries a tray of Champagne goblets containing Dom Pérignon Rosé by David Lynch. (The 1998 vintage: $11,179 for a 3-liter bottle.) The other woman offers caviar. The former president reaches out with one hand to grab pussy. The former president reaches out with the other hand to grab pussy. Neither woman recoils. Nor smiles. Maybe they’re robots. (I say this because there’s an opportunity here to intro artificial intelligence into the film. According to Stephen Hawking, it’s humanity’s greatest disaster.)

Anyway, Hillary Clinton’s four or five feet away with George, Laura, G.H.W., and Barbara Bush, cackling about Muammar el-Qaddafi’s murder.

Lynne Cheney dabs at a smidge of crème fraiche on her husband’s chin.

King Salman chats with Benjamin and Sara Netanyahu about the power of fear.

Francois Hollande chats with Xi Jinping and Angela Merkel about the power of fear.

Hollande’s partner, Julie Gayet, chats with Theresa May about the power of fear.

Sheldon Adelson chats with Lloyd Blankfein about the influence of money.

Adelson and Blankfein are joined by Gordon Tang and Huaidan Chen. Tang says, “We too want to chat about the influence of money.”

Henry Kissinger is heard mumbling to his wife Nancy, “The illegal we do immediately. The unconstitutional takes a little longer.”

Suddenly, a door opens. Donald Trump and Melania have arrived. Trump hears a familiar stridency, rushes to embrace HRC, and says, “Best debate ever. When I said Putin has no respect for you…”

Clinton cackles even more. “I know. I know. I thought I’d pee myself. I’m going to pee myself now, just thinking about it, and my response—that Putin would rather have you, a puppet, as president of the United…”

Trump interrupts with “Russian espionage against Americans.” He blows his nose and continues, nudging Tom Hanks, “When Hill said “Russian espionage and that nothing like this had ever happened in elections before, I thought it couldn’t be any better if it were scripted.”

“It was,” say Barack and Michelle Obama in unison. They fist bump.

Trump says, “I was joking.”

“Right, and your line about never having met Putin, that Putin’s not your best friend, blah, blah, blah. I nearly seized,” says Clinton. “Speaking of, he’s here.” Putin waves, swaggers toward them.

“Vlad,” says Clinton, “Donald and I have been congratulating ourselves, you know, our performances in the last debate.”

Someone says, “Oh, good, al-Baghdadi was able to make it.”

You see where I’m going with this. It’s not just a U.S. racket. It’s larger, global—globally orchestrated collusion.

Maybe I’ve seen something similar on Netflix. Dunno.

That night, after I’d conceived the idea, I added more. I knew a twist was necessary. I described the shocker to my guy. However, now that Jill Stein’s gone rogue, the denouement won’t be surprising. Here’s the ending you already may have guessed: Slowly, the camera focuses on faces, contorting mouths, the chewing of food, a tongue. A tongue licking lips. A tongue rooting, prying a morsel from between two teeth. A belch. Another. Amid the cacophony of sterling silver tearing through rare prime rib and striking Royal Copenhagen Flora Donica, glass thudding against inlaid mahogany, the viewer hears chatter. Someone says, “We really should toast the Deplorables, the voters who will never be at the table, never at the party.” Laughter. Slowly, the camera moves around the room to the entrance. The door opens. A radiant Jill Stein has arrived.

More articles by:

Missy Beattie has written for National Public Radio and Nashville Life Magazine. She was an instructor of memoirs writing at Johns Hopkins’ Osher Lifelong Learning Institute in BaltimoreEmail: missybeat@gmail.com

bernie-the-sandernistas-cover-344x550
October 17, 2019
Steve Early
The Irishman Cometh: Teamster History Hits the Big Screen (Again)
Jonathan Cook
Israel Prepares to Turn Bedouin Citizens into Refugees in Their Own Country
Stan Cox
Healing the Rift Between Political Reality and Ecological Reality
Jeff Klein
Syria, the Kurds, Turkey and the U.S.: Why Progressives Should Not Support a New Imperial Partition in the Middle East
George Ochenski
The Governor, the Mining Company and the Future of a Montana Wilderness
Charles Pierson
Bret Stephens’ American Fantasy
Ted Rall
The First Thing We Do, Let’s Fire All the Cops
Jon Rynn
Saving the Green New Deal
Ajamu Baraka
Syria: Exposing Western Radical Collaboration with Imperialism
Binoy Kampmark
A Coalition of Support: Parliamentarians for Julian Assange
Thomas Knapp
The Down Side of Impeachment
Harvey Wasserman
What Really Happened to American Socialism?
Tom Engelhardt
American Brexit
October 16, 2019
Patrick Cockburn
How Turkey’s Invasion of Syria Backfired on Erdogan
Chitrangada Choudhury – Aniket Aga
How Cotton Became a Headache in the Age of Climate Chaos
Jack Rasmus
US-China Mini-Trade Deal: Trump Takes the Money and Runs
Michael Welton
Communist Dictatorship in Our Midst
Robert Hunziker
Extinction Rebellion Sweeps the World
Peter A. Coclanis
Donald Trump as Artist
Chris Floyd
Byzantium Now: Time-Warping From Justinian to Trump
Steve Klinger
In For a Dime, in For a Dollar
Gary Leupp
The Maria Ramirez Story
Kim C. Domenico
It Serves Us Right To Suffer: Breaking Down Neoliberal Complacency
Kiley Blackman
Wildlife Killing Contests are Unethical
Colin Todhunter
Bayer Shareholders: Put Health and Nature First and Stop Funding This Company!
Andrés Castro
Looking Normal in Kew Gardens
October 15, 2019
Victor Grossman
The Berlin Wall, Thirty Years Later
Raouf Halaby
Kurdish Massacres: One of Britain’s Many Original Sins
Robert Fisk
Trump and Erdogan have Much in Common – and the Kurds will be the Tragic Victims of Their Idiocy
Ron Jacobs
Betrayal in the Levant
Wilma Salgado
Ecuador: Lenin Moreno’s Government Sacrifices the Poor to Satisfy the IMF
Ralph Nader
The Congress Has to Draw the Line
William A. Cohn
The Don Fought the Law…
John W. Whitehead
One Man Against the Monster: John Lennon vs. the Deep State
Lara Merling – Leo Baunach
Sovereign Debt Restructuring: Not Falling Prey to Vultures
Norman Solomon
The More Joe Biden Stumbles, the More Corporate Democrats Freak Out
Jim Britell
The Problem With Partnerships and Roundtables
Howard Lisnoff
More Incitement to Violence by Trump’s Fellow Travelers
Binoy Kampmark
University Woes: the Managerial Class Gets Uppity
Joe Emersberger
Media Smears, Political Persecution Set the Stage for Austerity and the Backlash Against It in Ecuador
Thomas Mountain
Ethiopia’s Abiy Ahmed Wins Nobel Peace Prize, But It Takes Two to Make Peace
Wim Laven
Citizens Must Remove Trump From Office
October 14, 2019
Ann Robertson - Bill Leumer
Class Struggle is Still the Issue
Mike Miller
Global Climate Strike: From Protest To Power?
Patrick Cockburn
As Turkey Prepares to Slice Through Syria, the US has Cleared a New Breeding Ground for Isis
FacebookTwitterRedditEmail