Eliminate Them Both 

The presidential election is fewer than a hundred days away and, even though both are wildly disliked by all but a small group of zealots, either Hillary Clinton or Donald Trump will win, we’re told.

In addition to the fact that the two candidates each have unprecedentedly high unfavorability ratings (of nearly sixty per cent), and both display little interest in meaningfully addressing catastrophic climate change, widening poverty, and other effects of our biophagous political economy, the two do differ. Beyond their respective styles (or lack thereof), and their preferences concerning strongmen, the two are distinguished by the groups of people they plan to persecute, and the wars they’re likely to foment.

But since Clinton’s support of intervention and aggression (in Iraq, Libya, Honduras, Ukraine, and Afghanistan, not to mention her proposal for a broader US role in Syria) promises to only intensify US militarism, raising the possibility of war with Russia, among others, and the ethnic cleansing of immigrants and Muslims (which constitutes the bulk of Trump’s platform – though the Democrats are no strangers to carrying out mass deportations themselves) are all anathema, what’s one to do?

Because it’s extremely unlikely that an earthquake, or super-tornado, will swallow the stage during one of their debates (a disaster that, in today’s nationalistic climate, would probably be attributed to Russia, or China, or Islam – or all three in a sort of axis of evil redux – which would only strengthen the power blocs subtending the status quo), Clinton and Trump, and their agendas, will have to be knocked out another way. Rather than through the divine violence of a natural disaster, those disgusted by Clinton and Trump can simply vote – for the Green Party’s Jill Stein, or for the Libertarian Party’s candidate, that reefer addict, Gary Johnson.

Notwithstanding the influentiality of political pundits’ predictions, and the preeminent programmability of the plastic human mind, because even their supporters dislike them, a Clinton or Trump presidency may not be inevitable after all. Over three months before the election, there’s still plenty of time for the political analogue of an earthquake, or tornado, to eliminate them both.

Elliot Sperber is a writer, attorney, and adjunct professor. He lives in New York City and can be reached at elliot.sperber@gmail.com and on twitter @elliot_sperber

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