What Tsipras And Hollande Really Talked About When the French President Visited Greece…

News on 11 November that Prime Minister of Greece, Alexis Tsipras, is throwing his support behind the unions striking in Greece on Thursday over the Eurozone austerity policies that Alexis Tsipras himself agreed to implement…..

And…. overheard on a recent state visit to Greece. President Hollande and Prime Minister Tsipras in conversation shortly before a wreath laying ceremony….

Hollande: I don’t know, I don’t know, Tsippy, I just don’t know what I’m going to do. I have Le Pen after me, that dreadful Sarkozy is looking to get in again and that homme horrible German, Schauble, wants to do to us what he’s done to you.

What am I going to do Tsippy – I’m lost.

Tsipras (legs bent, adopting Andreas Papandreou anti-NATO pose) Look Frankie, you just gotta take out these people…

Hollande (a bit more hopeful now): You mean …take them out? Comme – take them out like Jean Paul Belmondo did?

Tsipras (adopting visionary Obama pose): Oxi, Oxi. And Frankie you mussta learned that word by now. No Frank – you take them out by becoming them. You’re them so, no opposition left to chase after you . Oxi? You’ve taken over their job see?

Hollande: Qu’est que tu dit? Ce n’est possible. Moi? Le Pen? Sarkozy? Oxi. I mean, Non.

Tsipras (looking Professorial now): It’s handy Frank, that I learned English in 3 days. Now by osmosis, I can understand your French too. I’m told I’m very bright. Yanis and Tsakalotos taught me, but my God did they fight over who knew the better English…..and that Tsakalotos , he speaks no Greek. No, Frank you don’t become THEM like in an alien movie – you just take over their opposition functions. You know, as government you propose things one day and then, the very next day, you oppose them. Too simple really. You can even pay yourself the salary the opposition gets.

Hollande: Mais, mais…how can one do such things? There are still the unions. Tu comprende?

Tsipras (adopting Nobel Prize winner pose): Look Frank. Next Thursday all the Greek unions are going to be demonstrating against EuroZone austerity policies and the Memorandum I signed. And I’m 100% with them – 100%. I have told them so. I disagree with what I agreed to. Told them so…..Go out and demonstrate against me I told them. Demonstrate against the worse government ever. My government. Do it. Riot. The works. I deserve it. I’m useless. A bloodsucker. Yes Frankie, that’s what I told them and they love it. They love me. The polls have me way ahead. Do it. Try it Frank. Just once. They believe anything. You can say anything. And they believe it. You won’t believe it….

Hollande (adopting Napoleonic pose): Mon Dieu. Je suis Sarkozy. Je suis le Generale. Je….Je suis…Je suis ….Marine le Pen….

James Athanassiou lives in Athens.