FacebookTwitterGoogle+RedditEmail

Into the Future

Astonishing theater unfolded in Washington, DC when former Presidents George W. Bush and Barack Obama and former Vice Presidents Richard Cheney and Joe Biden were taken into custody and transported to a courthouse soon after arriving in the United States. Photographers captured images of the four, revealing that Cheney no longer wore his signature sneer.

Exiled to Saudi Arabia in 2011 during the Justice Revolution in early July, the men rarely were seen in public. Rumor had it that they, as well as family members and their dogs, were well disguised when attending events outside the palace.

In February of 2011, Cheney was hunting in Texas with a 33-year-old acquaintance. According to Cheney, a wayward shot accidentally killed his hunting partner. The grieving parents of the victim, Mary and Joe Christus, challenged the account, accusing Cheney of deliberately shooting their son whose heart was removed and transplanted to the former VP by a staff of cardiac surgeons among the mobile ambulance crew at the scene. The Christus family demanded legal action. Although many Americans had no access to healthcare and were down to beans, rice, and contaminated tap water, Jersey Shore was nearing its season cliffhanger. The pleas for due process, therefore, failed to elicit support from anyone except members of the peace and justice communities.

A major shift in activism erupted in late May after the San Andreas and New Madrid Seismic Zones battled over whose fault was bigger. All hell broke loose when a decision was made?to see which side could kick the other’s ass back to the Stone Age. Buildings and already-crumbling infrastructure collapsed in a multitude of locations.

Under anesthesia and her plastic surgeon’s familiar knife during an aftershock, Nancy Pelosi felt nothing. The physician attempted to maintain his balance on the cracking, moving floor, but he slipped and the scalpel penetrated Pelosi’s brain through her left eye.

Cleanup of Richter 10 hadn’t begun when hurricanes ripped through the oil-and-dispersant-soaked waters of the Gulf Coast and up the Atlantic, invading land and wreaking disaster of biblical measure. Where tornados seldom occurred, funnel clouds were common. The skies rained steroidal felines and pit bulls. Miami, Florida was buried under 30 inches of snow?in June.

Walking with arms stretched upward, Rapturists spoke revelatory words and moaned joyously. Most were mugged.

Martial law was declared. Mercenaries were recalled from Afghanistan, Iraq, Pakistan, and Yemen but, soon, individuals within the professional military joined forces with their family members and neighbors.

The Justice Revolution was born on July 4th. Chanting was heard:

No more Kool-aid like Jersey Shore.

Human rights will be restored.

Whatcha mean? We never had ’em.

Not even Eve and Adam had ’em.

Tabula rasa, reconciliation.

Power to the people, not the nation.

Bush, Cheney, Obama, and Biden were whisked away, by a few remaining loyalists, aboard Air Force One while Congressmen and women begged for mercy, whining: “Why aren’t our Big Corporations showing us their benevolent personhood?” The banksters had left, days before, for the islands, where they’d deposited taxpayer money in personal accounts.

Speaker John Boehner succumbed to alcohol poisoning, at the foot of his favorite barstool, his face in a puddle of his own vomit. His wife couldn’t be found. Lobbyist Lisbeth Lyons was asked to identify the body and reportedly said, “That can’t be John. Everyone knows he’s not blue.”

And it came to pass that this was both an ending and that which follows?a beginning, one of enduring peace.

But there can be no peace without justice.

So, it was fortuitous that the despots arrived from exile and were arrested and held accountable.

The war criminals, Bush, Cheney, Obama, and Biden, along with all neocon sympathizers, were prosecuted and imprisoned. Political prisoners were released. Detainees were repatriated.

Children played together, entering each other’s houses through unlocked front doors.

The Sun shown when it was supposed to. Rain arrived just as it was needed. And zephyrs came and went as they pleased.

A Muslim center was built near Ground Zero, and no one protested.

A single state with equal rights for Palestinians and Israelis was created.

Dick Cheney, finally, told the truth about EVERYTHING. This provided the Christus family some small comfort as they continued to grieve the death of their carpenter son.

Missy Beattie conceived the idea for this article while moving forward on her elliptical trainer. She can be contacted at missybeat@gmail.com.

 

More articles by:

Missy Beattie has written for National Public Radio and Nashville Life Magazine. She was an instructor of memoirs writing at Johns Hopkins’ Osher Lifelong Learning Institute in BaltimoreEmail: missybeat@gmail.com

December 10, 2018
Jacques R. Pauwels
Foreign Interventions in Revolutionary Russia
Richard Klin
The Disasters of War
Katie Fite
Rebranding Bundy
Gary Olson
A Few Thoughts on Politics and Personal Identity
Patrick Cockburn
Brexit Britain’s Crisis of Self-Confidence Will Only End in Tears and Rising Nationalism
Andrew Moss
Undocumented Citizen
Dean Baker
Trump and China: Going With Patent Holders Against Workers
Lawrence Wittner
Reviving the Nuclear Disarmament Movement: a Practical Proposal
Dan Siegel
Thoughts on the 2018 Elections and Beyond
Thomas Knapp
Election 2020: I Can Smell the Dumpster Fires Already
Weekend Edition
December 07, 2018
Friday - Sunday
Steve Hendricks
What If We Just Buy Off Big Fossil Fuel? A Novel Plan to Mitigate the Climate Calamity
Jeffrey St. Clair
Cancer as Weapon: Poppy Bush’s Radioactive War on Iraq
Paul Street
The McCain and Bush Death Tours: Establishment Rituals in How to be a Proper Ruler
Jason Hirthler
Laws of the Jungle: The Free Market and the Continuity of Change
Ajamu Baraka
The Universal Declaration of Human Rights at 70: Time to De-Colonize Human Rights!
Andrew Levine
Thoughts on Strategy for a Left Opposition
Jennifer Matsui
Dead of Night Redux: A Zombie Rises, A Spook Falls
Rob Urie
Degrowth: Toward a Green Revolution
Binoy Kampmark
The Bomb that Did Not Detonate: Julian Assange, Manafort and The Guardian
Robert Hunziker
The Deathly Insect Dilemma
Robert Fisk
Spare Me the American Tears for the Murder of Jamal Khashoggi
Joseph Natoli
Tribal Justice
Ron Jacobs
Getting Pushed Off the Capitalist Cliff
Macdonald Stainsby
Unist’ot’en Camp is Under Threat in Northern Canada
Senator Tom Harkin
Questions for Vice-President Bush on Posada Carriles
W. T. Whitney
Two Years and Colombia’s Peace Agreement is in Shreds
Ron Jacobs
Getting Pushed Off the Capitalist Cliff
Ramzy Baroud
The Conspiracy Against Refugees
David Rosen
The Swamp Stinks: Trump & Washington’s Rot
Raouf Halaby
Wall-to-Wall Whitewashing
Daniel Falcone
Noam Chomsky Turns 90
Dean Baker
An Inverted Bond Yield Curve: Is a Recession Coming?
Nick Pemberton
The Case For Chuck Mertz (Not Noam Chomsky) as America’s Leading Intellectual
Ralph Nader
New Book about Ethics and Whistleblowing for Engineers Affects Us All!
Dan Kovalik
The Return of the Nicaraguan Contras, and the Rise of the Pro-Contra Left
Jeremy Kuzmarov
Exposing the Crimes of the CIAs Fair-Haired Boy, Paul Kagame, and the Rwandan Patriotic Front
Jasmine Aguilera
Lessons From South of the Border
Manuel García, Jr.
A Formula for U.S. Election Outcomes
Sam Pizzigati
Drug Company Execs Make Millions Misleading Cancer Patients. Here’s One Way to Stop Them
Kollibri terre Sonnenblume
Agriculture as Wrong Turn
James McEnteer
And That’s The Way It Is: Essential Journalism Books of 2018
Chris Gilbert
Biplav’s Communist Party of Nepal on the Move: Dispatch by a Far-Flung Bolivarian
Judith Deutsch
Siloed Thinking, Climate, and Disposable People: COP 24 and Our Discontent
Jill Richardson
Republicans Don’t Want Your Vote to Count
John Feffer
‘Get Me Outta Here’: Trump Turns the G20 into the G19
FacebookTwitterGoogle+RedditEmail