FacebookTwitterGoogle+RedditEmail

Why I Like Ann Coulter

A week has passed since Annie Coulter uttered her latest cluster bomb of a soundbite. Like cluster bombs, a hollow shell drops from Annie’s drawn, wrinkled mouth and thousands of bomblets explode in the liberal media in response.

As a veteran teaser, I recognize an ancient shtick when I see one. When I was a child, engaging in childish behavior, I would tease my little sister unmercifully. She was the perfect target for my cruel gags because she always bit the bait. Whether I was making her toys appear and reappear or pretending that I was dead, she’d inevitably cry or get angry. In the mid-1960s she tearfully accused me of being “just like the Viet Cong.” I bemusedly asked her why and she replied “they put chopsticks in peoples’ ears.”

Like my sister, every time itsy-bitsy, teensy-weensy, skinny-minny Annie Coulter flaps her gums, steam shoots from the ears of progressives and self-proclaimed decent folk and they publish apoplectic jeremiads against her. This is precisely what she wants. She allegedly charges twixt $25,001 and $50,000 for each personal appearance before the invade-their-countries-kill-their-leaders-convert-them-to-Christianity crowd. Every controversy over her remarks ups her profile and profitability. Yet the politically correct marks seem oblivious to the fact that they’re being used.

Personally, I like her. She’s a self-made caricature, a combo of Joe McCarthy and aging, anorexic, blonde supermodel. At least she’s original in this respect. But more importantly, I’m thoroughly entertained by her. She makes me laugh. While she has none of the deep morality, innate decency, or wit of the late Lenny Bruce, she, like him, obliterates notions of that horrible falsehood called “nice.” This is not a nice world we live in and Annie Coulter proves that the right-wing are not nice people, but racists, homophobes, greedheads, and murderers. Like Lenny, Annie speaks The Truth. For that alone, she serves a crucial purpose, one for which I am grateful.

The next time Annie sticks chopsticks into the collective ear of the left, I suggest that the overly sensitive ignore her. If the Coulters of the world had their way, they’d execute me, but they haven’t completely trashed the Constitution just yet. I eagerly await Annie’s next performance. It’s a grim world and I need the laugh.

MICHAEL SIMMONS is an award-winning journalist and currently filming a documentary on the Yippies. He can be reached at guydebord@sbcglobal.net.

 

More articles by:

Michael Simmons is a musician and journalist. He can be reached at guydebord@sbcglobal.net.

July 16, 2018
Sheldon Richman
Trump Turns to Gaza as Middle East Deal of the Century Collapses
Charles Pierson
Kirstjen Nielsen Just Wants to Protect You
Brett Wilkins
The Lydda Death March and the Israeli State of Denial
Patrick Cockburn
Trump Knows That the US Can Exercise More Power in a UK Weakened by Brexit
Robert Fisk
The Fisherman of Sarajevo Told Tales Past Wars and Wars to Come
Gary Leupp
When Did Russia Become an Adversary?
Uri Avnery
“Not Enough!”
Dave Lindorff
Undermining Trump-Putin Summit Means Promoting War
Manuel E. Yepe
World Trade War Has Begun
Binoy Kampmark
Trump Stomps Britain
Wim Laven
The Best Deals are the Deals that Develop Peace
Kary Love
Can We Learn from Heinrich Himmler’s Daughter? Should We?
Jeffrey St. Clair
Franklin Lamb, Requiescat in Pace
Weekend Edition
July 13, 2018
Friday - Sunday
Brian Cloughley
Lessons That Should Have Been Learned From NATO’s Destruction of Libya
Paul Street
Time to Stop Playing “Simon Says” with James Madison and Alexander Hamilton
Jeffrey St. Clair
Roaming Charges: In the Land of Formula and Honey
Aidan O'Brien
Ireland’s Intellectuals Bow to the Queen of Chaos 
Michael Collins
The Affirmative Action Silo
Andrew Levine
Tipping Points
Geoff Dutton
Fair and Balanced Opinion at the New York Times
Ajamu Baraka
Cultural and Ideological Struggle in the US: a Final Comment on Ocasio-Cortez
David Rosen
The New McCarthyism: Is the Electric Chair Next for the Left?
Ken Levy
The McConnell Rule: Nasty, Brutish, and Unconstitutional
George Wuerthner
The Awful Truth About the Hammonds
Robert Fisk
Will Those Killed by NATO 19 Years Ago in Serbia Ever Get Justice?
Robert Hunziker
Three Climatic Monsters with Asteroid Impact
Ramzy Baroud
Europe’s Iron Curtain: The Refugee Crisis is about to Worsen
Nick Pemberton
A Letter For Scarlett JoManDaughter
Marilyn Garson
Netanyahu’s War on Transcendence 
Patrick Cockburn
Is ISIS About to Lose Its Last Stronghold in Syria?
Joseph Grosso
The Invisible Class: Workers in America
Kim Ives
Haiti’s Popular Uprising Calls for President Jovenel Moïse’s Removal
John Carroll Md
Dispatch From Haiti: Trump and Breastfeeding
Alycee Lane
On Heat Waves and Climate Resistance
Ed Meek
Dershowitz the Sophist
Howard Lisnoff
Liberal Massachusetts and Recreational Marijuana
Ike Nahem
Trump, Trade Wars, and the Class Struggle
Olivia Alperstein
Kavanaugh and the Supremes: It’s About Much More Than Abortion
Manuel E. Yepe
Korea After the Handshake
Robert Kosuth
Militarized Nationalism: Pernicious and Pervasive
Binoy Kampmark
Soft Brexits and Hard Realities: The Tory Revolt
Helena Norberg-Hodge
Localization: a Strategic Alternative to Globalized Authoritarianism
Kevin Zeese - Nils McCune
Correcting The Record: What Is Really Happening In Nicaragua?
Chris Wright
The American Oligarchy: A Review
Kweli Nzito
Imperial Gangster Nations: Peddling “Democracy” and Other Goodies to the Untutored
FacebookTwitterGoogle+RedditEmail