John Bolton to the UN

In Bushzarro world, where up is down and logic is irrational, Bush nominates a man as ambassador to the United Nations who believes there is no United Nations. “There’s no such thing as the United Nations,” John Bolton declared in 1994. ”If the U.N. secretary building in New York lost 10 stories, it wouldn’t make a bit of difference.” Like the character Bizarro created by Otto Binder, Bolton Bizarro has a brain apparently functioning at a level of a kid — or more accurately, Bolton Bizzaro operates on the level of a playground bully minus Ritalin.

In response to a media mention of the above quote, State Department spokesman Richard Boucher said: “I wouldn’t call it ‘rather peculiar’. This is a man who in the past has worked very closely with the United Nations on a number of issues. He’s always called for the UN to be more effective.” Indeed, more effective at becoming irrelevant, as Bolton’s boss so famously declared.

Jesse Helms commented on Bolton’s irrational bully-boy stance when he told the neocon criminal organization, the American Enterprise Institute, “John Bolton is the kind of man with whom I would want to stand at Armageddon.” Considering Bolton’s take on international treaties — he never saw one he didn’t want to send through a paper shredder — Armageddon may not be entirely out of the question.

For Bolton Bizarro, as senior vice president of the American Enterprise Institute, the idea of international law, specifically the International Criminal Court (ICC), is “a product of fuzzy-minded romanticism [that] is not just naive, but dangerous.” So ecstatic was Bolton over the decision of the United States to become an outlaw nation — sending a letter U.N. Secretary General Kofi Annan on May 6, 2002 renouncing the Rome Treaty, signed by Clinton on December 31, 2000 — he told the Wall Street Journal it was “the happiest moment of my government service.” In Bushzarro world, there is nothing wrong with the crime of genocide, crimes against humanity, war crimes, and the crime of aggression — in fact, as the invasions of Iraq and Afghanistan demonstrate, such crimes are to be considered normal behavior between states. In renouncing the ICC, the United States joined such enlightened nations as China, Iraq, Libya, Yemen, Qatar, and Israel in refusing to abide by the ICC.

In Bushzarro world, the lack of evidence a nation is producing weapons of mass destruction is evidence that nation is bristling with WMD and plans to use them. Iraq is the obvious example of this upside down cake of logic, however Bolton has decided to add Cuba to the batter. “I believe the case for the existence of a developmental Cuba (biological weapons research and development) effort is strong,” Bolton declared, minus absolutely any evidence. “Those are the usual, ridiculous lies that this man habitually makes about Cuba,” responded Lazaro Herrera Martinez, first secretary of the Cuba Interests Section in Washington. “It is ridiculous to say that Cuba poses a threat to the national security” of the United States. In fact, as history demonstrates, the United States has attempted to undermine the national security of Cuba for decades, including the use of weapons of mass destruction against the small and harmless island nation. Over the years, according to numerous sources, the United States has covertly used hemorrhagic dengue fever, African swine fever, Q fever, blue mold, and rust disease against humans and crops in Cuba. (See William H. Schaap, Bioterror: Manufacturing Wars the American Way. )

“At a meeting of diplomats in Europe before the Iraq war, Bolton was ‘so outrageous’ in his opinions about Iraq that the normally staid diplomats were openly rolling their eyes in disbelief, according to one ambassador who attended,” notes Newsday. In Bushzarro world, this is precisely the sort of person for the job of representing the United States in an international forum, especially a forum that sorely needs its building renovated by ten stories. No doubt eyes will be rolling back in saner heads for the next four years.
In fact, since Israel and the United States are connected at the hip, Bolton Bizzaro is the ideal choice for ambassador, especially considering the United Nations, routinely outraged by Israel’s wanton slaughter of innocent Palestinians, has issued nearly as many resolutions against the tiny outlaw state as the International House of Pancakes serves up hotcakes on Saturday morning. Referencing his notorious curriculum vitae, Bolton admitted his fondness for Zionism. “Indeed, one highlight of my professional career was the 1991 successful effort to repeal the General Assembly’s 1975 resolution equating Zionism with racism, thus removing the greatest stain on the UN’s reputation,” Bizarro Bolton proudly confessed. Never mind that more than a few people in the world consider Zionism a particularly racist colonial manifestation, essentially an apartheid philosophy — in fact, the United Nations, realizing Zionism is a form of racism, passed Resolution 3379, referencing a 1973 resolution condemning “the unholy alliance between South African racism and zionism,” and also a 1963 resolution which determined that “any doctrine of racial differentiation or superiority is scientifically false, morally condemnable, socially unjust and dangerous.”

Of course, in Bushzarro world, racist nations are democracies and warmongers are ambassadors of peace. If anything, the nomination of John Bolton to serve as ambassador to the United Nations demonstrates that the Bushcons are determined to not only slice ten stories off the UN building but also make a mockery of international law — a process well under way as we cross the Rubicon of Bush’s second term — and possibly realize Jesse Helm’s dream of ushering in Armageddon with John Bolton riding on a white horse beside the Christian Zionist Lord, His eyes “as a flame of fire and his vesture dipped in blood bear[ing] the name, King of kings and Lord of lords. Followed by the armies of heaven, He will smite the nations and cause the Beast and the False Prophet to be cast into the Lake of Fire.” (Rev.19:11-21, Joel 3:9-14, Ps.2:2-3).

In the current context, the nations smited will be Syria, Iran, North Korea, and Cuba, per Bush’s expanding and contracting “axis of evil” roster.

KURT NIMMO is a photographer and multimedia developer in Las Cruces, New Mexico. Visit his excellent no holds barred blog at . Nimmo is a contributor to Cockburn and St. Clair’s, The Politics of Anti-Semitism. A collection of his essays for CounterPunch, Another Day in the Empire, is now available from Dandelion Books.

He can be reached at:

KURT NIMMO is a photographer and multimedia developer in Las Cruces, New Mexico. Visit his excellent no holds barred blog at . Nimmo is a contributor to Cockburn and St. Clair’s, The Politics of Anti-Semitism. A collection of his essays for CounterPunch, Another Day in the Empire, is now available from Dandelion Books. He can be reached at: