McBypass Nation

Are you shocked? William Jefferson Clinton, poster boy for the American way of life (and death), has “significant blockages in three or four coronary arteries” and, as a result, will undergo triple or quadruple bypass surgery. Characterized by the New York Times as “a cigar smoker who has had a lifelong fondness for high-fat and fried foods and has often struggled with weight problems,” Clinton nonetheless blamed the problem in part on “genetics.”

In a telling passage, Times reporter Robert D. McFadden explains, “As is the case with many people, even those who have access to excellent health care (MZ: three cardiologists were present for Clinton’s exam), the heart trouble appeared to come out of the blue” (MZ: despite the fact that medical tests done in January 2001 showed signs that Clinton was at risk of heart disease, with a raised cholesterol level).

By the end of the Times article, we’ve also learned that 516,000 heart bypass surgeries were performed in 2001, the latest year for which data are available…and we are reminded that Vice President Dick Cheney has suffered heart attacks in 1978, 1984, 1988, and 2000, and underwent quadruple bypass surgery in August 1988.

Welcome to McBypass Nation:

* Bill Clinton lives on McDonald’s, rarely exercises, and was warned about heart disease more than three years ago…but it was genetics that got him “out of the blue.” (Maybe Bubba was following the guidance of another proud-but hardly svelte-Democrat, Michael McMoore, who says: “Vegetarianism is unhealthy…(so) put down those sprouts and pick up a T-bone!”)

* Lucky for Clinton (and Cheney and McMoore, for that matter), he had a battery of doctors to step in…because the rest of us nobodies don’t have “access to excellent health care.”

* With or without “excellent health care,” those at the mercy of Western medicine will likely learn nothing about prevention and nutrition…and end up as one of the half-million facing the knife each year. After all, more Americans die from heart disease each year than all the Americans killed in all the American wars combined. Seems like the most dangerous weapon in the human arsenal just might be the fork.

Howard Lyman, the former-cattleman-turned-vegan who was sued-along with Oprah-for having the nerve to mention Mad Cow Disease on national TV says: “To make our choices informed ones, we have to start with the facts.” Facts helped Lyman and Oprah win the lawsuit; the only problem now is picking which facts to squeeze into this article.

Should I tell you that amid the election-year rhetoric about violence, 9 billion animals will be murdered this year for food? Do I explain how at 98.7° (body temperature), animal fat is solid (think: pork chop) while plant fat (olive oil) is liquid? Not surprisingly, the risk of death from heart attack for the average American is 50%; for a vegan, 4%.

Here’s one I couldn’t resist: Since our digestive tract is too long to efficiently digest meat, that pork chop can sit there putrefying for weeks. Accordingly, Americans consume more laxatives than anyone else. Think about it, almost all our legislative, judicial, health-related, and military decisions are made by constipated old white guys.

Is it helpful to articulate that roughly 14 times as many people could be fed by using the same land currently reserved for grazing and a main reason global rain forests are disappearing is to make way to raise doomed cattle? I’ll bet you haven’t seen anything on MTV lately about how the water needed to maintain this bloody enterprise is drained from rivers, depleting hydroelectric plants, and inspiring Westinghouse to build more nuclear power plants to eventually leak and anoint us with a plutonium aromatherapy.

Got milk? Before showing off your mustache, consider that cow’s milk has 3 times more protein and 7 times more mineral content than human milk-which contains 10 times the essential fatty acids, 3 times the selenium, and half the calcium. In other words, cow’s milk is perfect…for calves (which grow a lot faster for people).

Want more? Try the MICKEY Z. test: Each day, 27 American children die from poverty and starvation while 15 million animals are slaughtered for food. Worldwide, 60 million people starve to death each year. Every 55 seconds, an American dies of cancer. Every 45 seconds, an American suffers a fatal heart attack. Every two seconds, on planet earth, a child starves to death.

Go ahead, do the math. How many have we lost while you read this article? How many will we lose while Bill Clinton is on the operating table surrounded by a team of overpriced and undereducated doctors?

Leave Bill Clinton, Dick Cheney, and Michael McMoore to their burgers, their clogged arteries, and their focus on which Yale-educated, warmongering millionaire takes control of the imperialist agenda in November. It would be far more revolutionary if Americans tuned out the propaganda and took full responsibility for their health, their lives, and their planet…before it’s too late.

MICKEY Z. is the author of “The Seven Deadly Spins: Exposing the Lies Behind War Propaganda” (Common Courage Press). For more information, please visit



Mickey Z. is the author of 12 books, most recently Occupy this Book: Mickey Z. on Activism. Until the laws are changed or the power runs out, he can be found on the Web here. Anyone wishing to support his activist efforts can do so by making a donation here. This piece first appeared at World Trust News.