Click amount to donate direct to CounterPunch
  • $25
  • $50
  • $100
  • $500
  • $other
  • use PayPal
Please Support CounterPunch’s Annual Fund Drive
We don’t run corporate ads. We don’t shake our readers down for money every month or every quarter like some other sites out there. We only ask you once a year, but when we ask we mean it. So, please, help as much as you can. We provide our site for free to all, but the bandwidth we pay to do so doesn’t come cheap. All contributions are tax-deductible.
FacebookTwitterGoogle+RedditEmail

Tax Cuts and Job Creation

Despite criticism from Democrats and a number of influential opponents of his new tax cut plan, President Bush announced that a man was employed as a result of his 2001 tax cut of $1.35 trillion.

The discovery is expected to stem criticism that the wealthy were primarily the beneficiaries and the tax cut did nothing to create jobs.

“This will put a nail in the coffin of that class war thingie,” said the president. “This proves that tax cuts create jobs and if you pass my tax cut bill this year, and next year and the next year, pretty soon, there will be jobs. Of course, we also have to get rid of those pesky minimum wage problemations to put the righteous to work.”

Finding someone employed as a result of Bush’s 2001 $1.35 trillion tax cut came after a year long search involving the FBI, the CIA, and the Department of Homeland Security. Although 26,000 agents conducted the hunt, security officials brushed aside criticism that more important security problems were ignored. “We can’t locate 388,000 criminal aliens in this country, so this is good practice for us,” said Homeland Security Secretary Tom Ridge. “I promise if there are more out there, we’ll find them someday. This is not a waste of time.”

Security officials located Jesus Ramirez, a 33-year-old Mexican immigrant, who obtained his $2.95 an hour job as a gate guard after 100 homeowners at Trophy House Luxury Gated Community in Houston, Texas received refunds as a result of Bush’s 2001 tax cut.

“Our families were scraping by on $350,000 a year and couldn’t afford to pay for security,” said Jimmy Bookmaker, a Halliburton executive and president of the gated community association, whose motto is “Because we are better than you.” “With tax cuts of $18,000 each, we can finally afford someone to sit in our guard house and buzz in visitors. You can’t imagine the relief we feel.”

Touting the trickledown effect of Ramirez’s $180.00 take home pay from his 70-hour weekly paycheck, Treasury Secretary John Snowjob expects another job to turn up within weeks. This “snowball” effect will help the “soggy economy” and pretty soon all boats will be floating, Snowjob told Fox News on Sunday.

Despite Democratic descriptions of Bush’s newest tax cut as “hogwash,” Snowjob pointed proudly to Ramirez as an example of what it means to be truly American. “This proves beyond a reasonable doubt that tax relief creates jobs,” Snowjob said. “So what if government debt equals $70,000 per family? That’s only $6.4 trillion dollars. True Americans worry about security; they could care less about deficits and other boring stuff.”

The discovery of the stimulus effect from the 2001 tax cut was met with jubilation. In Texas, ultra-conservative Republican legislators voted to cut taxes and abolish pensions, medical care, public schools and other “evil” government programs.

The plan to distribute $20 billion to the states was praised by New York City Mayor Michael Bloomberg who looks forward to $3.8 billion in the 2003 tax cut bill to solve the city’s problems. “Getting the federal government to increase debt so we don’t have to raise taxes on our wealthy citizens is a grand idea,” said Bloomberg. “We can always cut services for the poor who don’t vote anyway.”

President Bush is pushing his tax cut plan by meeting with small business owners in Albuquerque, N.M., Omaha, Neb., and Indianapolis, Ind., who are planning on taking advantage of his tax deductions of $87,000 to purchase 6,000 pound, $102,000 SUVs. By making his appeal directly to those who will benefit from the tax breaks, Bush is exploring new ground.

Until now, administration efforts have been directed at making people believe that they will be better off with fewer public services and a massive invasion army. “Everybody in America wants to be rich and identifies with the rich,” said Ari Flyswatter, White House spokesman. “Naturally everyone wants rich people to keep more of their hard earned money so they can get richer.”

When asked about the $400 billion military budget, the $100 billion a year bill to occupy Iraq and the $300 billion deficit this year, Flyswatter invited newsmen back to the White House next month when President Bush expects to introduce two more people who obtained jobs from his 2001 tax cut package. The End

DON MONKERUD is an Aptos, California-based columnist and author who follows politics. monkerud@cruzio.com

 

More articles by:
October 18, 2018
Dean Baker
How Big is Big? Trump, the NYT and Foreign Aid
Vern Loomis
The Boofing of America
October 17, 2018
Patrick Cockburn
When Saudi Arabia’s Credibility is Damaged, So is America’s
John Steppling
Before the Law
Frank Stricker
Wages Rising? 
James McEnteer
Larry Summers Trips Out
Muhammad Othman
What You Can Do About the Saudi Atrocities in Yemen
Binoy Kampmark
Agents of Chaos: Trump, the Federal Reserve and Andrew Jackson
David N. Smith
George Orwell’s Message in a Bottle
Karen J. Greenberg
Justice Derailed: From Gitmo to Kavanaugh
John Feffer
Why is the Radical Right Still Winning?
Dan Corjescu
Green Tsunami in Bavaria?
Rohullah Naderi
Why Afghan Girls Are Out of School?
George Ochenski
You Have to Give Respect to Get Any, Mr. Trump
Cesar Chelala
Is China Winning the War for Africa?
Mel Gurtov
Getting Away with Murder
W. T. Whitney
Colombian Lawyer Diego Martinez Needs Solidarity Now
Dean Baker
Nothing to Brag About: Scott Walker’s Economic Record in Wisconsin:
October 16, 2018
Gregory Elich
Diplomatic Deadlock: Can U.S.-North Korea Diplomacy Survive Maximum Pressure?
Rob Seimetz
Talking About Death While In Decadence
Kent Paterson
Fifty Years of Mexican October
Robert Fantina
Trump, Iran and Sanctions
Greg Macdougall
Indigenous Suicide in Canada
Kenneth Surin
On Reading the Diaries of Tony Benn, Britain’s Greatest Labour Politician
Andrew Bacevich
Unsolicited Advice for an Undeclared Presidential Candidate: a Letter to Elizabeth Warren
Thomas Knapp
Facebook Meddles in the 2018 Midterm Elections
Muhammad Othman
Khashoggi and Demetracopoulos
Gerry Brown
Lies, Damn Lies & Statistics: How the US Weaponizes Them to Accuse  China of Debt Trap Diplomacy
Christian Ingo Lenz Dunker – Peter Lehman
The Brazilian Presidential Elections and “The Rules of The Game”
Robert Fisk
What a Forgotten Shipwreck in the Irish Sea Can Tell Us About Brexit
Martin Billheimer
Here Cochise Everywhere
David Swanson
Humanitarian Bombs
Dean Baker
The Federal Reserve is Not a Church
October 15, 2018
Rob Urie
Climate Crisis is Upon Us
Conn Hallinan
Syria’s Chessboard
Patrick Cockburn
The Saudi Atrocities in Yemen are a Worse Story Than the Disappearance of Jamal Khashoggi
Sheldon Richman
Trump’s Middle East Delusions Persist
Justin T. McPhee
Uberrima Fides? Witness K, East Timor and the Economy of Espionage
Tom Gill
Spain’s Left Turn?
Jeff Cohen
Few Democrats Offer Alternatives to War-Weary Voters
Dean Baker
Corporate Debt Scares
Gary Leupp
The Khashoggi Affair and and the Anti-Iran Axis
Russell Mokhiber
Sarah Chayes Calls on West Virginians to Write In No More Manchins
Clark T. Scott
Acclimated Behaviorisms
Kary Love
Evolution of Religion
FacebookTwitterGoogle+RedditEmail