You’re Ariel Sharon and Life is Good

You’re Ariel Sharon, Israel’s Prime Minister. Your troops, on Nov. 23, 2002, shot to death a British subject, Iain John Hook. He was the highly respected UN project manager at Jenin, where your army had previously been accused of committing war crimes against the Palestinians. Hook was inside the UN compound, at Jenin, when the murder occurred. The Israeli killers said Mr. Hook appeared to have “a gun” in his hand. It was actually a cell phone! I’m sure it was just another of those darn “Israeli mistakes,” like the IDF’s massacre at Cana, Lebanon, on April 18, 1996; and, the IDF’s murderous attack on the USS Liberty on June 8, 1967. British P.M. Tony Blair will surely understand. Anyway, isn’t he George W. Bush Jr.’s lackey?

Meanwhile, you’re Ariel Sharon! What’s a little “mistake” between friends?

You even had to smile to yourself, when you issued your latest lame excuse for reoccupying Bethlehem, one of the holiest sites in Christendom. Your storm troopers closed the town down and even kept the Palestinian Christians from attending Sunday Mass at the ancient Church of the Nativity. No need to worry. Who really cares? Cardinal Edward M. Egan, Archbishop of New York City, was too busy viewing the NFL’s NY Jets beating the Buffalo Bills, 31 to 13, to even notice. By the way, is the IDF going to be in Bethlehem on Christmas Day, too?

Things couldn’t be better. You’re Ariel Sharon.

Those pesky Belgian state prosecutors tried to indict you for the supposed heinous war crimes you perpetrated at Sabra and Shatila. Lucky for you, an appellant court said, it had no jurisdiction since you’re not a resident of that country. Be careful, don’t let anybody offer you a free vacation to Belgium. Remember what happened to Chile’s General Augusto Pinochet on his UK holiday. It could happen to you, too!

You’re an international statesman. You’re Ariel Sharon.

In New York City, Mayor Michael Bloomberg is endorsing a gargantuan property tax hike of 18 % for its residents. Meanwhile, your accountants, Slick, Slash and Burn, are preparing a $10 billion shakedown of the American taxpayers. It supposed to be a loan guarantee, but we both know, Israel never repays it loans to the dumb Yankee goyim. This $10 billion will be in addition to the yearly $7 billion handout.

But, don’t worry. You’re Ariel Sharon.

Thanks to one of your favorite political hack, Sen. Joseph I. Lieberman (D-CT), the U.S. now has a “Homeland Security Agency,” to watch over the “home of the brave.” And, to further curtail the possibility of any genuine dissent in the “land of the free,” two more of your senatorial boy-ohs, Arlen Specter (R-PA) and Charles Schumer (D-NY), pushed through, without a public hearing, the Bill-of-Rights’-shredding “USA Patriot Act.” The duo are the godfathers of this scheme, which they seeded in the mid-90s. They are so clever their fingerprints can’t be found on the law.

You’re feeling pretty safe now. Your name is Ariel Sharon.

In fact, on Oct. 3, 2001, when you barked at a Tel Aviv Cabinet meeting, according to Israel Radio, (Kol Yisrael): “I want to tell you something very clear, don’t worry about America. We, the Jewish people, control America, and the Americans know it.” Well, you did go a little overboard on that one. Even if you’re right about the Jews controlling America, I still think it was a real stretch to say, “the Americans know it.” I think if they did know it, you, and the other bad Zionists, too, would be sent to your rooms, and forbidden to watch the “Jerry Springer TV Show!”

You’re smart. You’re clever. You’re Ariel Sharon.

You were mouthing off to the Times of London recently. And, darn if you didn’t say, “The day after U.S. troops finish off Saddam, they should turn their guns against Tehran.” Now, you almost blew the Zionist cover on that one. Most Americans are clueless about your country’s agenda about using the U.S. military to destroy Israel’s Arab enemies. Chicken hawk Richard Perle didn’t help either. He told members of the UK Parliament (11/25/02, Daily Mirror), the U.S. would attack Iraq, even if UN inspectors failed to find any weapons. Making President George W. Bush Jr. look like a dupe for Tel Aviv isn’t good for business Ariel.

Ariel Sharon is the man. Right and wrong are just words.

When you hold your press conferences in Tel Aviv, you tend to sit at your desk, behind a huge photo of your political guru, the late Vladimir Jabotinsky, an extreme right-winger, even by Likud’s low political standards. Now, this isn’t too smart. The press might find out that he advocated the ethnic cleansing of Palestinians from their own land. Some folks, too, think you will use a U.S.-led Gulf War II, as a cover to forcibly transfer all of the Palestinians to Jordan. Now, just cool it! Okay! Simply remove the Jabotinsky’s portrait and replace it with Jonathan Pollard’s!

Hey, time marches on. Ariel Sharon keeps ticking away.

Finally, last week, as your intentionally provocative colonial occupation policies continued to fuel a horrific cycle of violence, you railed, that you will “cut the hand off” anyone that strikes Israel. That’s a bloody kind of metaphor and it doesn’t help your reputation. Talking about hands, we met, in Dec., 1977. I even shook your hand. It was at a farewell banquet for Baltimoreans visiting the Holy Land, which was held in Tel Aviv. Since that time, I’ve noticed that I’m always washing my hand, like it has blood or some foreign substance on it. Does the Arab village of Qibya, in 1953, and Unit 101, bring back any memories for you? Oh heck, why spoil the party? Everything is always coming up roses for you.

You’re Ariel Sharon, and life is good.

WILLIAM HUGHES is the author of “Baltimore Iconoclast” (Writer’s Showcase), which is available online. He can be reached at liamhughes@mindspring.com.


More articles by:


Weekend Edition
April 19, 2019
Friday - Sunday
Andrew Levine
What Will It Take For Trump to Get His Due?
Roy Eidelson
Is the American Psychological Association Addicted to Militarism and War?
Jeffrey St. Clair
Roaming Charges: Time is Blind, Man is Stupid
Joshua Frank
Top 20 Mueller Report “Findings”
Rob Urie
Why Russiagate Will Never Go Away
Paul Street
Stephen Moore Gets Something Right: It’s Capitalism vs. Democracy
Russell Mokhiber
Why Boeing and Its Executives Should be Prosecuted for Manslaughter
T.J. Coles
The Battle for Latin America: How the U.S. Helped Destroy the “Pink Tide”
Ron Jacobs
Ho Chi Minh City: Nguyen Thai Binh Street
Dean Baker
Fun Fictions in Economics
David Rosen
Trump’s One-Dimensional Gender Identity
Kenn Orphan
Notre Dame: We Have Always Belonged to Her
Robert Hunziker
The Blue Ocean Event and Collapsing Ecosystems
Theodore C. Van Alst, Jr.
Paddy Wagon
Brett Wilkins
Jimmy Carter: US ‘Most Warlike Nation in History of the World’
John W. Whitehead
From Jesus Christ to Julian Assange: When Dissidents Become Enemies of the State
Nick Pemberton
To Never Forget or Never Remember
Stephen Cooper
My Unforgettable College Stabbings
Louis Proyect
A Leftist Rejoinder to the “Capitalist Miracle”
Louisa Willcox
Aldo Leopold’s Land Ethic and the Need for a New Approach to Managing Wildlife
Brian Cloughley
Britain Shakes a Futile Fist and Germany Behaves Sensibly
Jessicah Pierre
A Revolutionary Idea to Close the Racial Wealth Divide
George Burchett
Revolutionary Journalism
Dan Bacher
U.S. Senate Confirms Oil Lobbyist David Bernhardt as Interior Secretary
Nicky Reid
The Strange Success of Russiagate
Chris Gilbert
Defending Venezuela: Two Approaches
Todd Larsen
The Planetary Cost of Amazon’s Convenience
Kelly Martin
How the White House is Spinning Earth Day
Nino Pagliccia
Cuba and Venezuela: Killing Two Birds With a Stone
Matthew Stevenson
Pacific Odyssey: Guadalcanal and Bloody Ridge, Solomon Islands
David Kattenburg
Trudeau’s Long Winter
Gary Olson
A Few Comments on the recent PBS Series: Reconstruction: America After the Civil War
Ellen Lindeen
What Does it Mean to Teach Peace?
Adewale Maye and Eileen Appelbaum
Paid Family and Medical Leave: a Bargain Even Low-Wage Workers Can Afford
Ramzy Baroud
War Versus Peace: Israel Has Decided and So Should We
Ann Garrison
Vets for Peace to Barbara Lee: Support Manning and Assange
Thomas Knapp
The Mueller Report Changed my Mind on Term Limits
Jill Richardson
Why is Going Green So Hard? Because the System Isn’t
Mallika Khanna
The Greenwashing of Earth Day
Arshad Khan
Do the Harmless Pangolins Have to Become Extinct?
Paul Armentano
Pushing Marijuana Legalization Across the Finish Line
B. R. Gowani
Surreal Realities: Pelosi, Maneka Gandhi, Pompeo, Trump
Paul Buhle
Using the Law to Build a Socialist Society
David Yearsley
Call Saul
Elliot Sperber
Ecology Over Economy