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HOW MODERN MONEY WORKS — Economist Alan Nasser presents a slashing indictment of the vicious nature of finance capitalism; The Bio-Social Facts of American Capitalism: David Price excavates the racist anthropology of Earnest Hooten and his government allies; Is Zero-Tolerance Policing Worth More Chokehold Deaths? Martha Rosenberg and Robert Wilbur assay the deadly legacy of the Broken Windows theory of criminology; Gaming the White Man’s Money: Louis Proyect offers a short history of tribal casinos; Death by Incarceration: Troy Thomas reports from inside prison on the cruelty of life without parole sentences. Plus: Jeffrey St. Clair on how the murder of Michael Brown got lost in the media coverage; JoAnn Wypijewski on class warfare from Martinsburg to Ferguson; Mike Whitney on the coming stock market crash; Chris Floyd on DC’s Insane Clown Posse; Lee Ballinger on the warped nostalgia for the Alamo; and Nathaniel St. Clair on “Boyhood.”
No One Threatens to Flush America Down the Toilet!

Declare Debt-Default Extremists “Enema Combatants”

by BRIAN J. FOLEY Inc.

Tea Party extremists who threatened to put the U.S. government into default risked flushing America down the toilet. Had the U. S. defaulted, the full faith and credit of the United States would have been destroyed, the dollar’s value would have nosedived, and another Great Depression might have strangled the Nation.

President Obama acted as if he were powerless to avoid default, but there was a simple solution all along: Declare anyone threatening to plunge America into such deep shit as an ”enema combatant,” and flush the traitors down the toilet.

Obama should still do it. Striking back in this way will prevent similar shenanigans the next time the debt ceiling must be raised.

Such a decisive response would fit perfectly with President Obama’s ongoing attack on civil liberties, which has been to take President Bush’s crackdowns a giant leap further. Bush coined the term “enemy combatant” to create a category of humans not subject to human rights. Obama can turn humans into raw sewage.

These fiscal (fecal?) terrorists should be made to understand that no one, NO ONE, especially Members of Congress, threatens to flush America down the toilet.

Enema combatants should fester in Guantanamo. Government employees furloughed during the shutdown can take turns waterboarding them, reminding any whiners that most enema combatants have long supported torturing U.S. enemies.

President Obama might show a bit of mercy by assuring Tea Partiers that any medical treatment for injuries resulting from torture won’t be covered by Obamacare.

Or maybe President Obama should just avoid any legalistic bullshit and follow his usual policy: murder enema combatants with drones. He’s killed people for less!

Brian J. Foley, Inc. is a separate entity from Brian J. Foley, who created Brian J. Foley, Inc. after the United Supreme Court’s decision in Citizens United v. Federal Election Commission (2010), so he’d have more rights than you. brianjfoleyinc@gmail.com