FacebookTwitterGoogle+RedditEmail

Declare Debt-Default Extremists “Enema Combatants”

by BRIAN J. FOLEY Inc.

Tea Party extremists who threatened to put the U.S. government into default risked flushing America down the toilet. Had the U. S. defaulted, the full faith and credit of the United States would have been destroyed, the dollar’s value would have nosedived, and another Great Depression might have strangled the Nation.

President Obama acted as if he were powerless to avoid default, but there was a simple solution all along: Declare anyone threatening to plunge America into such deep shit as an ”enema combatant,” and flush the traitors down the toilet.

Obama should still do it. Striking back in this way will prevent similar shenanigans the next time the debt ceiling must be raised.

Such a decisive response would fit perfectly with President Obama’s ongoing attack on civil liberties, which has been to take President Bush’s crackdowns a giant leap further. Bush coined the term “enemy combatant” to create a category of humans not subject to human rights. Obama can turn humans into raw sewage.

These fiscal (fecal?) terrorists should be made to understand that no one, NO ONE, especially Members of Congress, threatens to flush America down the toilet.

Enema combatants should fester in Guantanamo. Government employees furloughed during the shutdown can take turns waterboarding them, reminding any whiners that most enema combatants have long supported torturing U.S. enemies.

President Obama might show a bit of mercy by assuring Tea Partiers that any medical treatment for injuries resulting from torture won’t be covered by Obamacare.

Or maybe President Obama should just avoid any legalistic bullshit and follow his usual policy: murder enema combatants with drones. He’s killed people for less!

Brian J. Foley, Inc. is a separate entity from Brian J. Foley, who created Brian J. Foley, Inc. after the United Supreme Court’s decision in Citizens United v. Federal Election Commission (2010), so he’d have more rights than you. brianjfoleyinc@gmail.com

 

Brian J. Foley is a lawyer and the author of A New Financial You in 28 Days! A 37-Day Plan (Gegensatz Press). Contact him at brian_j_foley@yahoo.com.

More articles by:

CounterPunch Magazine

minimag-edit

bernie-the-sandernistas-cover-344x550

zen economics

Weekend Edition
April 28, 2017
Friday - Sunday
Paul Street
Slandering Populism: a Chilling Media Habit
Andrew Levine
Why I Fear and Loathe Trump Even More Now Than On Election Day
Jeffrey St. Clair
Mountain of Tears: the Vanishing Glaciers of the Pacific Northwest
Philippe Marlière
The Neoliberal or the Fascist? What Should French Progressives Do?
Conn Hallinan
America’s New Nuclear Missile Endangers the World
Peter Linebaugh
Omnia Sunt Communia: May Day 2017
Vijay Prashad
Reckless in the White House
Brian Cloughley
Who Benefits From Prolonged Warfare?
Kathy Kelly
The Shame of Killing Innocent People
Ron Jacobs
Hate Speech as Free Speech: How Does That Work, Exactly?
Andre Vltchek
Middle Eastern Surgeon Speaks About “Ecology of War”
Matt Rubenstein
Which Witch Hunt? Liberal Disanalogies
Sami Awad - Yoav Litvin - Rabbi Lynn Gottlieb
Never Give Up: Nonviolent Civilian Resistance, Healing and Active Hope in the Holyland
Pete Dolack
Tribunal Finds Monsanto an Abuser of Human Rights and Environment
Christopher Ketcham
The Coyote Hunt
Mike Whitney
Putin’s New World Order
Ramzy Baroud
Palestinian, Jewish Voices Must Jointly Challenge Israel’s Past
Ralph Nader
Trump’s 100 Days of Rage and Rapacity
Harvey Wasserman
Marine Le Pen Is a Fascist—Not a ‘Right-Wing Populist,’ Which Is a Contradiction in Terms
William Hawes
World War Whatever
John Stanton
War With North Korea: No Joke
Jim Goodman
NAFTA Needs to be Replaced, Not Renegotiated
Murray Dobbin
What is the Antidote to Trumpism?
Louis Proyect
Left Power in an Age of Capitalist Decay
Medea Benjamin
Women Beware: Saudi Arabia Charged with Shaping Global Standards for Women’s Equality
Rev. William Alberts
Selling Spiritual Care
Peter Lee
Invasion of the Pretty People, Kamala Harris Edition
Cal Winslow
A Special Obscenity: “Guernica” Today
Binoy Kampmark
Turkey’s Kurdish Agenda
Guillermo R. Gil
The Senator Visits Río Piedras
Jeff Mackler
Mumia Abu-Jamal Fights for a New Trial and Freedom 
Cesar Chelala
The Responsibility of Rich Countries in Yemen’s Crisis
Leslie Watson Malachi
Women’s Health is on the Chopping Block, Again
Basav Sen
The Coal Industry is a Job Killer
Judith Bello
Rojava, a Popular Imperial Project
Robert Koehler
A Public Plan for Peace
Sam Pizzigati
The Insider Who Blew the Whistle on Corporate Greed
Nyla Ali Khan
There Has to be a Way Out of the Labyrinth
Michael J. Sainato
Trump Scales Back Antiquities Act, Which Helped to Create National Parks
Stu Harrison
Under Duterte, Filipino Youth Struggle for Real Change
Martin Billheimer
Balm for Goat’s Milk
Stephen Martin
Spooky Cookies and Algorithmic Steps Dystopian
Michael Doliner
Thank You Note
Charles R. Larson
Review: Gregor Hens’ “Nicotine”
David Yearsley
Handel’s Executioner
FacebookTwitterGoogle+RedditEmail