FacebookTwitterGoogle+RedditEmail

In Pursuit of Political Amnesia

by KATHLEEN PEINE

They thought they glimpsed a flash of Rick Perry’s soft underbelly. Eyes certainly strained from behind the Medicare benefit bifocals.  Yes, it was a soft underbelly! He showed a moment of compassion by mentioning that it was hardly fair to deny children of illegal immigrants in-state tuition because of a situation they did not create.  This caused a dull roar of disagreement amongst the faithful.

The Tea Party decided that this was not just a soft underbelly showing, but possibly a full blown line of mammary glands all just waiting to spray milk. The horror of a newly benevolent (and wimpy) Rick Perry filled them with concern. First the illegals would line up to suckle, then in mere moments, the welfare mommas would arrive (who of course by now includes welfare great-great-great grandmas by Teabagger minority- reproduction math). Probably the next logical step would be Abortionists joining in. Rick’s soft underbelly would nourish them all! The radical right was not impressed by Rick’s lactation potential. They know it’s a slippery slope-that word “empathy”.

I’m sure damage control sessions were rapidly organized after the debate.  Perry probably explained that of course he has to placate the Hispanic demographic in his state, but given the chance at the National level, he would drop that particular compassionate ideal faster than he’d drop a potassium filled needle into a retarded guy’s arm. But the damage was done.

It’s a strange, sad time when you’re only a real man if you state that you don’t ever lose sleep over executions, but mention that you are okay with handing out some tuition that isn’t quite punitive enough…well, that’s unforgivable. Even taking some time out to boo the gay soldier wasn’t enough to make them forget Perry’s lapse.

Mitt Romney, the other leading contender, had been deemed unspongeworthy before he even showed up. By unspongeworthy, I mean he’s a Mormon. The radical right, overwhelmingly in the Evangelical Christian camp, knows that this is a faith that has no relevance to them. If Romney had any sense he’d be planting some gold plates of a prophetic nature in the backyards of the Tea Party leaders. Upon unearthing, these plates could indicate that it’s necessary for Evangelical Christians to support Mormons, all because of an eventual battle set to take place in Utah. The bees will buzz, blood will flow and the devil will show up riding an All Terrain Vehicle with a gay sidekick. During the battle, many of the Mormons will change their faith and the others will conveniently die. I’ve heard that sort of thing has worked for other groups needing supportive dupes. But alas, Mitt hasn’t resorted to anything creative like that, so he will remain unspongeworthy for the duration.  He will continue to give stilted, embarrassing speeches calling everyone “my friend” as the sheen of his plastic blinds the crowds.

I see these candidates, the “frontrunners”  of their party, and I am taken aback by what the proper course of action should be. Community activism? Voting for the least- worst scoundrel? Updating the passport? I’ve come to the conclusion that the answer is Versed. This is a medication which causes memory loss, often used during unpleasant medical procedures. Some guy won’t remember telling the doctor that he had a similar experience at his frat house during the colonoscopy (but your doctor remembers). The drug is quite useful for erasing an entire event and this seems to be the only solution after witnessing these debates or any speech given on the campaign trail. Well, at least a solution for those of us who still feel pain upon realizing we are the same species as all of these clowns.

I’m not forgetting about Obama from planet Mendacity in all of this, he’s simply been fairly quiet during the Republican freakshow. I’m sure we will soon be treated to his newly discovered Populism (but only available in verbal flavor) soon enough. I have noticed that Obama supporters seem to have the ability to produce copious amounts of endogenous Versed, forgetting the promises and purported values of their disappointing suit.

In summary…….We’re gonna need an awful lot of Versed to get through this.

Kathleen Peine can be reached at kathypeine@gmail.com

More articles by:

CounterPunch Magazine

minimag-edit

Weekend Edition
August 26, 2016
Friday - Sunday
Paul Buhle
In the Shadow of the CIA: Liberalism’s Big Embarrassing Moment
Andrew Levine
How Donald Trump Can Still be a Hero: Force the Guardians of the Duopoly to Open Up the Debates
Rob Urie
Crisis and Opportunity
Louisa Willcox
The Unbearable Killing of Yellowstone’s Grizzlies: 2015 Shatters Records for Bear Deaths
Charles Pierson
Wedding Crashers Who Kill
Richard Moser
What is the Inside/Outside Strategy?
Dirk Bezemer – Michael Hudson
Finance is Not the Economy
Jeffrey St. Clair
Roaming Charges: Bernie’s Used Cars
Margaret Kimberley
Hillary and Colin: the War Criminal Charade
Patrick Cockburn
Turkey’s Foray into Syria: a Gamble in a Very Dangerous Game
Ishmael Reed
Birther Tries to Flim Flam Blacks  
Brian Terrell
What Makes a Hate Group?
Howard Lisnoff
Trouble in Political Paradise
Terry Tempest Williams
Will Our National Parks Survive the Next 100 Years?
Ben Debney
The Swimsuit that Overthrew the State
Ashley Smith
Anti-imperialism and the Syrian Revolution
Andrew Stewart
Did Gore Throw the 2000 Election?
Vincent Navarro
Is the Nation State and Its Welfare State Dead? a Critique of Varoufakis
John Wight
Syria’s Kurds and the Wages of Treachery
Lawrence Davidson
The New Anti-Semitism: the Case of Joy Karega
Mateo Pimentel
The Affordable Care Act: A Litmus Test for American Capitalism?
Roger Annis
In Northern Syria, Turkey Opens New Front in its War Against the Kurds
David Swanson
ABC Shifts Blame from US Wars to Doctors Without Borders
Norman Pollack
American Exceptionalism: A Pernicious Doctrine
Ralph Nader
Readers Think, Thinkers Read
Julia Morris
The Mythologies of the Nauruan Refugee Nation
George Wuerthner
Caving to Ranchers: the Misguided Decision to Kill the Profanity Wolf Pack
Ann Garrison
Unworthy Victims: Houthis and Hutus
Julian Vigo
Britain’s Slavery Legacy
John Stanton
Brzezinski Vision for a Power Sharing World Stymied by Ignorant Americans Leaders, Citizens
Philip Doe
Colorado: 300 Days of Sunshine Annually, Yet There’s No Sunny Side of the Street
Joseph White
Homage to EP Thompson
Dan Bacher
The Big Corporate Money Behind Jerry Brown
Kollibri terre Sonnenblume
DNC Playing Dirty Tricks on WikiLeaks
Ron Jacobs
Education for Liberation
Jim Smith
Socialism Revived: In Spite of Bernie, Donald and Hillary
David Macaray
Organized Labor’s Inferiority Complex
David Cortright
Alternatives to Military Intervention in Syria
Binoy Kampmark
The Terrors of Free Speech: Australia’s Racial Discrimination Act
Cesar Chelala
Guantánamo’s Quagmire
Nyla Ali Khan
Hoping Against Hope in Kashmir
William Hughes
From Sam Spade to the Red Scare: Dashiell Hammett’s War Against Rightwing Creeps
Raouf Halaby
Dear Barack Obama, Please Keep it at 3 for 3
Charles R. Larson
Review: Paulina Chiziane’s “The First Wife: a Tale of Polygamy”
David Yearsley
The Widow Bach: Anna Magdalena Rediscovered
FacebookTwitterGoogle+RedditEmail