FacebookTwitterGoogle+RedditEmail

The Vatican’s Top Ten Album List

by MARC A. CATONE

L’Osservatore Romano, the official newspaper of the Vatican, released its Top Ten Albums list this past week.
They are:

1:  Revolver…The Beatles
2:  Dark Side Of The Moon…Pink Floyd
3:  (What’s The Story) Morning Glory…Oasis
4:  Thriller… Michael Jackson
5:  Achtung Baby…U2
6:   Rumours…Fleetwood Mac
7:  The Nightfly…Donald Fagen
8:   Supernatural…Carlos Santana
9.   Graceland…Paul Simon
10.  If I Could Only Remember My Name…David Crosby

As a fervent Beatles fan, I am always happy to see an album by the Fab Four reach the top of anyone’s list of favorites.  More than likely, one of the reasons that “Revolver” was chosen Number One by the Vatican is the repeated observation of “I know what it’s like to be dead”  in “She Said She Said”.   However, that doesn’t explain the selection of an album containing “Eleanor Rigby” in which “no one was saved”.  Still, a compelling rationale for “Revolver” as the Church’s top choice might be “Taxman”, made in eternal thankfulness for their non-taxable holdings.  Obviously, the album, “Rubber Soul”, was never in the running.

Apparently, in the selection of “Thriller”, the Vatican has granted absolution to the late Michael Jackson for crotch grabbing in his videos.  “Achtung Baby” could be an indirect acknowledgement of the Church’s role during the Holocaust.  As for David Crosby, whose music I greatly enjoy…if I could only remember that album.  The glaring omission of “The Stranger” from the Top Ten list signals that the Holy See is not ready to forgive Billy Joel for “Only The Good Die Young”.   As for “Supernatural” by Carlos Santana…I saw an image of the “Last Supper” in this morning’s breakfast toast…perhaps the editor at L’Osservatore Romano had a similar experience.

Sources tell me that the B’nai B’rith is coming out with their own Top Ten List.  Rumor has it that they have selected “Magical Mystery Tour” by The Beatles as its top album based on a misunderstanding that one of the songs is entitled, “Your Mother Should Only Know”.

[No Dylan in that list. Osservatore Romano, now edited by with-it Gian Maria Vian, dissed him because he “had turned Messianic” after converting to Christianity, and because he had written “three-note songs” that “tried the ears and patience of listeners.” Editors.]

MARC A. CATONE can be reached at marc_catone@yahoo.com

More articles by:

CounterPunch Magazine

minimag-edit

bernie-the-sandernistas-cover-344x550

zen economics

February 28, 2017
Abel Cohen
The Trojan President: America Never Saw It Coming
February 27, 2017
Anthony DiMaggio
Media Ban! Making Sense of the War Between Trump and the Press
Dave Lindorff
Resume Inflation at the NSC: Lt. General McMaster’s Silver Star Was Essentially Earned for Target Practice
Conn Hallinan
Is Trump Moderating US Foreign Policy? Hardly
Norman Pollack
Political Castration of State: Militarization of Government
Kenneth Surin
Inside Dharavi, a Mumbai Slum
Lawrence Davidson
Truth vs. Trump
Binoy Kampmark
The Extradition Saga of Kim Dotcom
Robert Fisk
Why a Victory Over ISIS in Mosul Might Spell Defeat in Deir Ezzor
David Swanson
Open Guantanamo!
Ted Rall
The Republicans May Impeach Trump
Lawrence Wittner
Why Should Trump―or Anyone―Be Able to Launch a Nuclear War?
Andrew Stewart
Down with Obamacare, Up with Single Payer!
Colin Todhunter
Message to John Beddington and the Oxford Martin Commission
David Macaray
UFOs: The Myth That Won’t Die?
Weekend Edition
February 24, 2017
Friday - Sunday
Jeffrey St. Clair
Roaming Charges: Exxon’s End Game Theory
Pierre M. Sprey - Franklin “Chuck” Spinney
Sleepwalking Into a Nuclear Arms Race with Russia
Paul Street
Liberal Hypocrisy, “Late-Shaming,” and Russia-Blaming in the Age of Trump
Ajamu Baraka
Malcolm X and Human Rights in the Time of Trumpism: Transcending the Master’s Tools
John Laforge
Did Obama Pave the Way for More Torture?
Mike Whitney
McMaster Takes Charge: Trump Relinquishes Control of Foreign Policy 
Patrick Cockburn
The Coming Decline of US and UK Power
Louisa Willcox
The Endangered Species Act: a Critical Safety Net Now Threatened by Congress and Trump
Vijay Prashad
A Foreign Policy of Cruel Populism
John Chuckman
Israel’s Terrible Problem: Two States or One?
Matthew Stevenson
The Parallax View of Donald Trump
Norman Pollack
Drumbeat of Fascism: Find, Arrest, Deport
Stan Cox
Can the Climate Survive Electoral Democracy? Maybe. Can It Survive Capitalism? No.
Ramzy Baroud
The Trump-Netanyahu Circus: Now, No One Can Save Israel from Itself
Edward Hunt
The United States of Permanent War
David Morgan
Trump and the Left: a Case of Mass Hysteria?
Pete Dolack
The Bait and Switch of Public-Private Partnerships
Mike Miller
What Kind of Movement Moment Are We In? 
Elliot Sperber
Why Resistance is Insufficient
Brian Cloughley
What are You Going to Do About Afghanistan, President Trump?
Binoy Kampmark
Warring in the Oncology Ward
Yves Engler
Remembering the Coup in Ghana
Jeremy Brecher
“Climate Kids” v. Trump: Trial of the Century Pits Trump Climate Denialism Against Right to a Climate System Capable of Sustaining Human Life”
Jonathan Taylor
Hate Trump? You Should Have Voted for Ron Paul
Franklin Lamb
Another Small Step for Syrian Refugee Children in Beirut’s “Aleppo Park”
Ron Jacobs
The Realist: Irreverence Was Their Only Sacred Cow
Andre Vltchek
Lock up England in Jail or an Insane Asylum!
Rev. William Alberts
Grandiose Marketing of Spirituality
Paul DeRienzo
Three Years Since the Kitty Litter Disaster at Waste Isolation Pilot Plant
Eric Sommer
Organize Workers Immigrant Defense Committees!
FacebookTwitterGoogle+RedditEmail